...you call forth the five second rule and say to yourself, "well, they're McDonalds chips anyway, they're already fucked up. Dropping them on the floor shouldn't make a difference". Too bad spilt french fries are the least of my concerns. If I could afford french fries, this would worry me. The fact that I can't worries me even more.
Yes, that's right, folks - today's post is about MONEY.
I have never been good with money. I just haven't. I'm shite with it. When I was in A-level college, away from my parents for the first time and planted into a boarding school on the border to Wales surrounded by wheat and sheep I found myself spending my monthly allowance within the first week and a half. It would always be the same routine: get money, spend it on CD's and junk food, packs of cigarettes and a few trips to the cinema, then by the middle of the week I wouldn't have so much money but the boarding school gave us food anyway so that was covered but still spent money on cigarettes, then by the end of the week I'd find myself sifting through the ashtray for cigarette butts with a bit of tobacco still left on it and empty out as many as I could onto a rolling paper to light up and smoke and by the time the next month came around and I had my allowance again I'd be so pissed at the fact that I had no money for the past two weeks I'd spend it all again in the first week and a half and the vicious cycle would continue.
This would carry on through to university. This time, food was no longer confirmed so the cycle would start with the first week eating out everyday, second week cooking at home, third week would consist of beans on toast and by the fourth week anything that appeared edible in the fridge would be fair game.
With a spending habit such as this, it probably wasn't the best idea to get not one, but two casino memberships. I wouldn't go often, but when I did go it would be painful. Every time you'd think you're gonna play it safe, then you think you're gonna double your dough, then you're just hoping for enough for the bus fare home.
(The plus side of having a casino membership was that the swankier one had complimentary drinks and sandwiches so in times of desperation I'd put my best suit on, sit somewhere as if watching the other players and waiting for a seat, order seven sandwiches and get the fuck out of dodge).
Thankfully, Genting doesn't allow my kind into the casino which is probably for the best, but when I got back to Malaysia the cycle simply continued and I find myself these days living pretty much hand-to-mouth: get a job, get the pay, buy my shit, run out of cash, hope another job comes before I have to do something drastic involving an ill-fitting dress, make up and a tube of KY.
Now, before anyone says it, let me just say it for you - yes, all things considered, in the grand scheme of things I'm still a lucky bastard because there are way more unfortunate people than me in the world when it comes to finances. Shit, forget the world, there are way more unfortunate people within a 5 km radius. And this is true and I know this and my lament at the situation is not some kind of "oh, no, I'm so poor, I've got no money, what am I gonna do?"
It's not like that. I'm still pretty sorted as far as things go. I've got my car, I've got a roof over my head and I have access to basic food stuffs. My utilities are paid up for now and I can still switch on my computer and go on-line and download things I shouldn't be downloading and watch Craig Ferguson vids on youtube till the cows come home. I know that I'm still very fortunate and very lucky and it's not what this post is about.
This post is about how I need to learn this whole discipline about saving and pretty damn soon, 'cos a cloud gon' come from the West before you know it. Shit's hitting the fan all over the world, America and Europe are fucked beyond compare and it's spreading and I need to be prepared. We all do.
See, my first instinct when I realized what my bank balance was, "shit, I need another project to bring in some cash or I'm fucked".
(And incidentally, I somehow went on to lose my debit card directly after that but considering my bank balance whoever finds it will only be able to use it to buy a Mars bar so it's not too bad).
Although it is true that I need more cash coming in, that's not the real problem. Jobs can be found (at least, for now) and I know I'll figure something out. No, the real problem is making sure I keep some of it aside.
It's a simple premise, isn't it? Just keep some of it aside, that's it. You get your money, put some of it on the side, voila, all is well. But I just don't. I flat out don't. I have a separate high interest savings account but I pretty much spent most of it during the Dark Days of Depression when I was out of a job and trying to make rent in a dodgy apartment in Subang. There's a bit left, but I don't want to touch it. I want to add to it, and it's been my intention to add to it ever since I got out of the Dark Days but I've never put a cent in since.
How messed up is that?
I hope I can change this habit of mine. In the meantime, something tells me I'm gonna be posting up another item for sale on Facebook.
I hope it's not my ass-virginity.
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